Obscurity in Straight Sets

Here’s a little quiz for you:

The French Open is…

a. …the newest taste sensation from Wendy’s! A grilled chicken breast served open-faced, cordon bleu-style, on grilled focaccia bread!

b. …the nickname German’s had for the Maginot Line during WWII.

c. …a new kind of kiss invented by Christina Aguilera.

d. …a major tennis tournament.

If you answered D, you’re right, and obviously not a U.S. resident. Just like global warming, soccer, and every other nation’s cultural identity….we could care less. Unless, of course, a charasmatic American with exemplary hair is winning, then we’re totally there.


Many people have tried to accurately capture the essence that is Brian, but this much is known to be true: he has dutifully paid the hosting bill for Ranzino.com since 2001.

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