If you’re feeling down in the dumps and your confidence is hitting a low ebb, just relish this nugget.  You too can have your own stalker.

Hey, if former Mr. Belvedere thespian Bob Uecker can have one, why not you? Why not you?

Nothing boosts saggy self-esteem quicker than visits to your doorstop at 2 am, unwanted gifts, and the receipt of highly inappropriate personal photos.