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Where the Rustproofing is Always Complimentary
Fried Peanut Butter & Banana Sandwiches
Why are we, as Americans, obsessed with dead celebrities? It’s bad enough we fawn over the…
Top 5 Things The Creepy Guy Behind You In Line at the Grocery Store is Thinking
5. “Slim Fast…Yeah, good luck with that porky.”4. “Funyuns.”3. “Oooh, Bubblelicious!”2. “God dammit, I can clearly…
Keebler Roulette
Is there a worse holiday season phenomenon than the anxiety caused by trying to select the…
The Drive-Thru Window to My Soul
Dear Route 44 Dunkin’ Donuts, Hey…how’ve you been? I’ve been doing okay, I guess. You may…
Top 5 Things I Never Want to Hear on Television…Never…Ever…Again…Forever
5. The phrase ‘Nascar Dads’4. Dialouge spoken by Freddie Prinze Jr.3. What Oprah’s favorite things are2….
We Have a Chia Spill in Aisle 8
I wouldn’t describe myself as an impulse shopper. I’m not usually tempted by the newest and…
From the makers of Wonderbread comes…
…Ryan Seacrest, really, I mean what’s the big deal. I admit, I’m not a regular viewer…
The Cupholder Killer
Like most Americans, I subscribe to the motto “Bigger is Better.” Do you want to drive…
Ashton, Ashton, We All Fall Down!
I was at a Blockbuster Video for the first time in ages yesterday. You see, having…
The Pleasure Principle
Before this past Sunday, did you think there could have been anything, anyone could have done…